One thing that I have never really understood is this absolute need, almost to the point of hysteria, of finding out baby’s gender at or around 20 weeks. Some women can’t even wait that long and I’ve just never understood the need or the hype. Now, if you’re one of those people who HAS to know, then I’m not trying to say you’re crazy or anything, it’s just a concept I have personally never understood. My mom never found out with all 3 of her kids and my grandma didn’t either (not even sure they had the technology then). It’s something I always knew I would do, so for me it was really easy to wait until birth to find out my baby’s gender.

I am a HUGE supporter of Team Green. It’s really something I think everyone should experience. So here are my top 10 reasons as to why you should wait.

1. No Gender Disappointment

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Ya. There’s none of that ^^. I know a lot of people say that this is actually a reason to find out because you have 20+ weeks of getting over your disappointment. But I find it incredibly hard to think that after going through the pain of labor, finally getting babe out, and having this new bundle in your arms that anyone could be disappointed. No matter what you wanted. I mean, it’s just really hard to be disappointed looking into the face of a sweet little babe that you just created. It really is.

2. No Stereotypical Pink or Blue

Because you know, each gender can be associated with a lot of different colors but for some reason we strictly stick to pink for girls or blue for boys when they are babies. This was a big one for me because I HATE the color pink, I just hate it. And if we were going to have a girl I did not want to be bombarded with pink stuff, purple would have been ok but certainly not pink. Although, if we ever have a girl I can almost guarantee she will love pink because I hate it so much, heck our son might even really like it too! You just never know!

And have you seen gray, aqua, or yellow nurseries?? They are so stinkin’ cute!

3. Saves Money on Your Next Baby

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Not finding out sets you up to be a bit more frugal about things! Because if you have all neutral for the first baby (or second, third, fourth, whichever), then the next baby you have you don’t really have to buy anything new for! I mean of course your inner shopaholic will totally still buy some things but you don’t have to buy that much, really.

4. It is the Biggest and Best Surprise EVER.

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Honestly, there’s not many good surprises left in this world. So I think it should last as long as possible!

5. The scan can be WRONG!

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I have heard so many stories that the ultrasound tech got it wrong and the parents found out at a later scan or even after birth! I recently read that it happens about 10% of the time or 1 in every 10 scans. An ultrasound isn’t fool-proof, the technicians are human. It can certainly be wrong. This is one thing you don’t have to worry about if you just don’t find out in the first place!

6. Get the Classic “It’s a ____!!!” Movie Scene

This is something I wanted so bad and it lived up to every single one of my expectations and more. It’s an indescribable feeling you get when you hear “It’s a ____” after successfully having a baby. And then the excitement of watching your partner fly out of the room to tell people in the waiting room what we had. It’s just truly an amazing moment, it’s hard to describe. And I truly believe that it will top any balloon popping, mysterious cake eating, or painting thing that are done at gender reveal parties.

I also think this gets your partner more involved and gets part of the glory too. They get to be the bearer of good news! A moment your family will never forget.

7. Extra Motivation During Labor

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Now this one you can really take it or leave it. So many people swear by this reason so I’ve included it but for me it wasn’t really a motivator during labor. Getting our precious baby out of me and safely was my biggest motivator.

8. You Actually Get what You Need

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Ok, I’m going to be greedy for a minute. If you wait to find out gender then that forces people’s hands to get you what you need at your baby shower. They will get you things like muslin blankets or bottles (if you are planning to use them) or sheets, or books, or pacis or just everything instead of a big pile of clothes that your baby *might* wear. And if they do wear it, it will only be once.

9. You Can Still do Everything! Including Plan!

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Now it’s time for me to get real. It bugs me BEYOND belief when people say things like “I could never do that, I am too much of a planner” Why? Because I am a huge freaking planner. I literally had spreadsheets and a million lists of everything we needed and what to do before baby got here and you know how much we were able to do of it? ALLLLLLL of it. Our son had everything he needed and more, including clothes, before he got here. So it’s definitely possible, you just have to want it! And it really wasn’t that hard, I promise.

10. Because it Doesn’t Matter

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At the end of the day, whether you have a boy or a girl does not matter. What matters is you had a healthy baby. The only thing gender effects is a name (and there are plenty of gender neutral names out there too!) and potty training (which is a few years down the line anyway). You will still love them with your entire being and then some and you will still go to the end of the earth to make them happy, and you will teach them to be kind, respectful and decent people. In the grand scheme of things, genderΒ is a very small detail.

Now, if you are one of those people who just have to know, by all means do it! You do you! But if you have any little thought of wanting to wait, I urge you to wait. I have actually spoken with a handful of people who have done both and every single one of them said they preferred to wait. Every. One.

In my pregnancy I had a total of 17 ultrasounds (high risk) and I wasn’t tempted to find out once. There was never one single slip up. You can do this, if you want to!! I promise!

-Amanda

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Amanda

My name is Amanda and I am married to my lovely wife and we have a wonderful son together! I enjoy a little bit of everything, but I am a little obsessed with being a mom, fertility/pregnancy, and being organized!
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40 thoughts on “10 Reasons to Not Find out the Sex of Your Baby

  1. Ahhh you hit the nail on the head. People think I am crazy for not wanting to know my first child’s gender (when that time comes) but I just think it would be the dopest surprise ever and I know deep down I want a boy first…but after all of that waiting, I’d just be happy to have that kid out of there!

  2. I love this list and think it’s spot on. I didn’t want to know the gender of my last baby because I desperately wanted that surprise moment and I already had one of each. However, we found out. But it all turned out perfect. Thank you for sharing this great list!

  3. YES! THIS! All so true! Although we found out the gender with both babies, I would have loved to just not have known. No matter what, I will love the baby the same so why does the gender truly matter?

  4. Yes – I am glad that there are still parents opting to do this. We are too! We want that excitement of finding out once the baby comes out. Plus, love the practicality of buying gender-neutral baby stuff to save money on the next baby! My husband and I had the same thoughts when we were window shopping for strollers the other day!

    Abby of Life in the Fash Lane

  5. Haha I loved all the memes… and yes the results CAN be wrong! Then you have planned for the wrong gender the whole time. Talk about a let down – and a somewhat expensive one at times.

  6. I love the reasons, but I am too nosey not to know lol. I found out with both of mine just because I am impatient and can’t wait haha.

    1. It really is! Even though, obviously lol, I wasn’t in the waiting room to see it go down, just hearing about it gives me chills!

  7. I didn’t find out with either of my children. I had two homebirths with a midwife and didn’t have any ultrasounds anyway. Even if I needed an ultrasound, I wouldn’t have wanted to know.

    1. That’s awesome! I really wanted a home birth, or at least an all natural birth but I was diagnosed with Gestational Diabetes so that plan got thrown out the window unfortunately.

  8. I think you’re so right! I haven’t had kids yet but I’d be happy not knowing either way – I’m not a big planner anyway and I have designs on a gray nursery so all the rest of it don’t matter. And i LOVE where you talk about the ‘its a boy/girl’ moment during birth! That sounds like the right way to do it!

  9. It really can be a fun surprise. I did it both ways–didn’t find out with the first, but did for babies 2 and 3. Finding out and not finding out were each special in their own ways.

  10. I love all of these reasons! It definitely does NOT matter at all….just a healthy baby is what is most important. If we ever have another baby, I definitely want it to be a surprise.

  11. I’m one of those people who just HAD to know. πŸ™‚ But these are all good reasons not to!

  12. I’m one of those people who just HAD to know. πŸ™‚ These are all really good reasons not to find out though!

  13. Ha! All very good reasons and it really isn’t that big a deal, but being in the interior design field though I just could not πŸ™‚

    1. There are some REALLY cute neutral baby nurseries our there πŸ™‚ We did ours in gray and yellow chevron. With some elephants!

  14. I think i wanna know when time comes!! But all the reasons you write are perfect for patient moms

  15. I think i wanna know when time comes!! But all the reasons you write are perfect for patient moms πŸ™‚ Thanks for sharing

  16. I think i wanna know when time comes !! Awesome reasons for patient moms πŸ™‚ Thanks for sharing πŸ™‚

  17. I always said that when my husband and I had children we wouldn’t find out the sex. With my first we found out as my OB was worried about the growth of bub – all was okay in the end. With my second we found out purely by accident during the 3D scan when bub moved the wrong way. Could clearly see that it was a boy!!

  18. I can agree that there are merits to waiting – but for me, I wanted to know. I still had gender-neutral clothing just in case, and many other gender-neutral items as well, but I wanted the personal touch that hit me as soon as “the baby” became “my daughter.”

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